مقالات آیلتس

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it a valuable work experience, which is important for learning and taking responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, many children involved in different types of jobs to have some kind of financial assurance for themselves. However, whether this is good for their development and personality is a controversial issue. I personally believe that paid works is harmful for children for several reasons.

It is said that children gain valuable experience in the work place. This may be true. However, I would argue that children are mainly employed in jobs that require manual work and are poorly paid. The recent statistics reveal the common tasks that children are assigned to, are washing dishes, mopping floors or serving food in restaurants. Meanwhile, these kinds of jobs actually do not provide children with necessary and useful skills to apply in their future carrier.

On the other hand defenders of child labour argues that it is an effective method of learning. The point is children should be able to apply knowledge taught to them in a real life working environment. Although this is undoubtedly true, it also means that children may neglect the classroom study and even fail the class. The worst thing is yet to come. They may become so preoccupied with the benefits ahead of them such as small salary that they may leave school.

In my personal point of view it helps them to build responsibility in the family. They will understand how difficult it is to earn money and therefore have compassion for their parents. This is true to a certain extent, but may have a totally adverse effect on children. As children can make money at an early age, they would feel that it is appropriate to spend it on luxury things.

In conclusion, I think that parents should take measures to restrict their child from work, otherwise it would have negative consequences to their future.

تحلیل مقاله

Task response

the essay is not off-topic

the writer has stated his opinion concerning the given topic

the central paragraphs are well-supported

the writer has applied minimum 250 words

Coherence and cohesion

the message is clear

the writer has applied linking words, cohesive devices, pronouns and transitions appropriately

Grammar

The writer has used a range of related words to the topic with appropriate collocations

Vocabulary

The writer has used a wide range of structures correctly

 Band Score : 7.5

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